Is There Really a Gay Agenda?
Is there really a homosexual agenda? Is there truly an insidious gay plot to undermine traditional values and subvert the American family? The very idea of it appears to be laughable – especially to the gay and lesbian community.
According to one source, identified only as “L.,” this is the menacing and dangerous “gay agenda”:
The Gay Agenda
7:45 a.m. Alarm rings
8:00 a.m.-8:10 a.m. Take shower
8:15 a.m.-8:30 a.m. Dress and put items into briefcase
8:35 a.m. Leave house
8:45 a.m. Starbucks
9:00 a.m. Arrive at job
12:00 p.m. Lunch with a co-worker. Perhaps Chili’s?
12:45 p.m. Return to job
1:30 p.m.-2:30 p.m. Meeting
5:00 p.m. Leave work
5:30 p.m.-6:30 p.m. Work out in gym
7:00 p.m. Return home
7:20 p.m. Prepare and eat dinner
8:00 p.m. Watch Law & Order on TNT
11:00 p.m. Go to sleep
Do you detect just a little sarcasm? Then consider this anonymous, widely-circulated posting:
The Gay Agenda
Author Unknown
I know that many of you have heard Pat Robertson, Jerry Falwell and others speak of the “Homosexual Agenda,” but no one has ever seen a copy of it. Well, I have finally obtained a copy directly from the Head Homosexual. It follows below:
6:00 am Gym
8:00 am Breakfast (oatmeal and egg whites)
9:00 am Hair appointment
10:00 am Shopping
12:00 pm Brunch
2:00 pm
| 1) | Assume complete control of the U.S. Federal, State and Local Governments as well as all other national governments, |
| 2) | Recruit all straight youngsters to our debauched lifestyle, |
| 3) | Destroy all healthy heterosexual marriages, |
| 4) | Replace all school counselors in grades K-12 with agents of Colombian and Jamaican drug cartels, |
| 5) | Establish planetary chain of homo breeding gulags where over-medicated imprisoned straight women are turned into artificially impregnated baby factories to produce prepubescent love slaves for our devotedly pederastic gay leadership, |
| 6) | Bulldoze all houses of worship, and |
| 7) | Secure total control of the Internet and all mass media for the exclusive use of child pornographers. |
2:30 pm Get forty winks of beauty rest to prevent facial wrinkles from stress of world conquest
4:00 pm Cocktails
6:00 pm Light Dinner (soup, salad, with Chardonnay)
8:00 pm Theater
11:00 pm Bed (du jour)
A gay agenda? What a joke! Simply stated, a “gay agenda” does not exist anymore than a “Head Homosexual” exists – at least, that’s what many gays and lesbians would surely (and sincerely) say.